Kaip galiu geriau valdyti baimę ir atstūmimą arba santykių pažeidžiamumą?

Kaip galiu geriau valdyti baimę ir atstūmimą arba santykių pažeidžiamumą?

Pažeidžiamumas yra galingas įrankis, skirtas tarpusavio ryšiui kurti, tačiau daugeliui žmonių jis yra itin bauginantis. Baimė dėl pažeidžiamumo yra suprantama – dalintis savo intymiausiomis mintimis ir jausmais su kitais, neturint garantijos, kad sulauksite teigiamos reakcijos, yra tikrai sunku.

Kodėl pažeidžiamumas yra toks sunkus?

Pažeidžiamumo prigimtis, reikalaujanti dalintis tuo, dėl ko jaučiamasi gėdingai, natūraliai kelia sunkumų. Jūs tyčia rizikuojate būti įskaudintas, siekdami būti suprastas ir susisiekti su kitais giliau. Jei tai, ką atskleidžiate, nėra sunku ar baisu, tai nėra tikras pažeidžiamumas. Iš tiesų, žodyninė ‘pažeidžiamumo’ reikšmė yra „galimybė būti fiziškai ar emociškai sužeistam“. Nepaisant bauginančios pažeidžiamumo prigimties, jis yra neatsiejama dalis formuojant gilias asmenines santykius. Jis skatina abipusę empatiją, pasitikėjimą ir supratimą, kurie yra būtini kuriant ir palaikant sveikus, ilgalaikius santykius.

Kokia pažeidžiamumo sąsaja su atmetimu?

Pažeidžiamumas ir atmetimas yra neišvengiamos žmogaus patirties dalys, todėl svarbu žinoti, kaip tvarkytis su sudėtingais jausmais, kurie gali kilti dėl šių patirčių. Štai keletas metodų, kuriuos galite išbandyti:

Prisiminkite, kad atmetimas nedefiniuoja jūsų kaip asmens ir neveikia jūsų vertės

Pažeidžiamumo tyrinėtoja Brené Brown pabrėžia savigarbos svarbą savo „TedTalk“: „Buvo tik vienas kintamasis, kuris atskyrė žmones, turinčius stiprų priklausomybės jausmą, ir tuos, kurie tikrai dėl jo kovoja… žmonės, turintys stiprų priklausomybės jausmą, tiki, kad jie yra verti meilės ir priklausomybės.“ Tyrimas rodo, kad žmonės, turintys aukštesnę savigarbą, mažiau kenčia emociškai, kai susiduria su atmetimu. Žinoma, tikėti, kad esate vertas, yra lengviau pasakyti nei padaryti. Psichoterapija, savigarbos veiklos darbalapiai ir teigiami afirmacijos yra veiksmingos strategijos savigarbos didinimui.

Susitelkite į tai, ką galite laimėti, o ne į tai, ką galite prarasti

Nors pažeidžiamumas ir rizika būti atstumtam yra bauginantys, jie taip pat gali atverti naujas galimybes ir stiprinti santykius. Kai susiduriate su galimybe būti pažeidžiamu, bandykite permąstyti savo mąstymą ir vietoje to atkreipkite dėmesį į tai, ką galite laimėti. Pavyzdžiui, vietoje „kas, jei paklausiu draugo, ar nori eiti į pasimatymą, o jis nenori daugiau būti mano draugas?“, perkelkite šią mintį į „kas, jei paklausiu draugo, ar nori eiti į pasimatymą, ir jis sutinka, ir mes pradedame nuostabius romantinius santykius?“. Kaip ir bet kas, teigiamas mąstymas reikalauja praktikos, ir tai nebus tai, į ką jūsų smegenys pirmiausia pereis, kai tai pabandysite pirmą kartą, tačiau po kurio laiko jūsų mąstymas ir perspektyva pradės keistis.

Venkite daryti prielaidas apie kitų žmonių motyvus

Ypač tada, kai atmetimas nėra lydimas paaiškinimo, lengva leisti savo mintims išsiskleisti su visais dalykais, kuriuos galėjote padaryti neteisingai, kad „nusipelnytumėte“ tokios reakcijos. Tai yra suprantama reakcija, bet ne produktyvi. Negalima atspėti, kas vyksta kažkieno mintyse, nebent jie aiškiai tai paaiškina, ir net tada nesusipratimas visada yra galimybė. Priešingu atveju, manydami, kad blogiausia – kad žmogus jūsų nekenčia ar kad su jumis kažkas negerai – tik dar labiau paskatinsite savo nerimą dėl situacijos. Tyrimas parodė, kad teigiamas mąstymas padidina atsparumą kasdieniams stresoriams. Tai reiškia, kad kuo daugiau stengsitės pakeisti savo nerimą keliančias mintis į teigiamas, tuo geriau galėsite susitvarkyti su nerimą keliančiu stresoriumi. Kai kyla šios mintys, pripažinkite jas ir bandykite leisti joms praeiti arba priešintis joms primenant sau, kad jų elgesys neturi įtakos jūsų vertei, nepriklausomai nuo jų motyvų.

Toliau kilkitės ir vėl pateikite save

Galbūt sunkiausia ir svarbiausia dalis tvarkantis su baime dėl atmetimo yra patirtis, susijusi su juo. Kai patiriate atmetimo skausmą, natūralus instinktas yra noras pastatyti emocines sienas, kad vėl nepatirtumėte skausmo. Deja, tai turės nepageidaujamą šalutinį poveikį, užkertant kelią gilių santykių kūrimui. Turite leisti sau sielvarti ir išgyventi savo jausmus, kad galėtumėte judėti pirmyn. Būti pakartotinai veikiamam nerimą keliančio stimulo gali būti būtina norint sumažinti nerimą. Verksmas, dienoraščio rašymas, buvimas gamtoje arba bet kokia kita veikla, kuri leidžia išreikšti neigiamas emocijas, gali padėti apdoroti šią patirtį ir leisti judėti į priekį. Galbūt, pakankamai nutolus nuo skausmingos patirties, net galite įvertinti, ko ji jus išmokė ir kaip ji padėjo jums augti.

Išvada

Pažeidžiamumas neabejotinai yra iššūkis, nes jis reikalauja, kad mes atskleistume savo giliausias dalis, neturint jokios garantijos dėl teigiamo rezultato. Tai ypač aktualu tiems, kurie patyrė traumą arba yra neurodivergentiški, ir tai daug lengviau pasakyti nei padaryti. Neurodivergentiškiems žmonėms dažnai būna sunku būti pažeidžiamais dėl kelių priežasčių, įskaitant Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (atmetimo jautrumo disforija), traumą ir skirtingus bendravimo stilius nei jų neurotipiniai kolegos. Tačiau būtent per šį pažeidžiamumo aktą mes atveriame duris į gilius ir prasmingus ryšius su kitais. Netgi pats iššūkis ir skausminga atmetimo patirtis yra svarbūs asmeniniam augimui ir emociniam atsparumui ugdyti. Jei patiriate sunkumų dėl pažeidžiamumo ar atmetimo, apsvarstykite galimybę ieškoti pagalbos pas psichikos sveikatos specialistą. Priimdami pažeidžiamumą, mes galime skatinti empatiją, pasitikėjimą ir supratimą, kurie yra esminiai elementai kuriant ir puoselėjant sveikus, ilgalaikius santykius.

507 thoughts on “Kaip galiu geriau valdyti baimę ir atstūmimą arba santykių pažeidžiamumą?
  1. Hi there! Do you know if they make any plugins to help with SEO?
    I’m trying to get my blog to rank for some targeted keywords but I’m
    not seeing very good gains. If you know of any please share.
    Many thanks! I saw similar article here: Eco blankets

  2. I’m impressed, I have to admit. Rarely do I come across a blog that’s equally educative and entertaining, and let me tell you, you’ve hit the nail on the head. The issue is an issue that not enough men and women are speaking intelligently about. Now i’m very happy I found this during my search for something relating to this.

  3. I’m impressed, I must say. Seldom do I come across a blog that’s equally educative and amusing, and without a doubt, you’ve hit the nail on the head. The issue is an issue that not enough people are speaking intelligently about. Now i’m very happy that I came across this during my hunt for something concerning this.

  4. Hi, I do believe this is an excellent website. I stumbledupon it 😉 I am going to revisit yet again since I book marked it. Money and freedom is the greatest way to change, may you be rich and continue to help other people.

  5. Oh my goodness! Impressive article dude! Many thanks, However I am having problems with your RSS. I don’t understand why I can’t join it. Is there anybody getting the same RSS issues? Anyone that knows the solution will you kindly respond? Thanks.

  6. And with regards to flowers, do as the decorators do: A cache of graceful apple blossom branches or delicate yellow forsythia (you can pressure your individual each spring) are much more enlightened in an Asian-inspired room than a fussy association.

  7. American patriot paper maker Frederick Bicking owned a fishery on the river prior to the American Revolution, and Thomas Paine tried in vain to interest the residents in funding an iron bridge over this river, before abandoning „pontifical works” on account of the French Revolution.

  8. I really love your blog.. Great colors & theme. Did you build this amazing site yourself? Please reply back as I’m attempting to create my own website and want to learn where you got this from or just what the theme is named. Kudos.

  9. Having read this I thought it was very informative. I appreciate you finding the time and effort to put this content together. I once again find myself spending a lot of time both reading and posting comments. But so what, it was still worth it!

  10. A fascinating discussion is definitely worth comment. There’s no doubt that that you should publish more on this issue, it may not be a taboo subject but usually people don’t talk about such subjects. To the next! All the best!

  11. Thank you for sharing superb information. Your web site is so cool. I’m impressed by the details that you’ve on this website. It reveals how nicely you perceive this subject. Bookmarked this website page, will come back for more articles.

  12. Can I just say what a comfort to find a person that genuinely knows what they are discussing on the web. You definitely realize how to bring an issue to light and make it important. More and more people really need to check this out and understand this side of your story. It’s surprising you are not more popular given that you most certainly have the gift.

  13. Thanks for making the sincere attempt to explain this. I think very robust about it and want to learn more. If it’s OK, as you attain more extensive knowledge, may you mind including extra posts similar to this one with additional information? It would be extremely useful and helpful for me and my colleagues. [Reply]

  14. This design is incredible! You obviously know how to keep a reader amused. Between your wit and your videos, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Excellent job. I really enjoyed what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it. Too cool!

  15. Appreciate your sharing the right go over that, I think truly regarding coupled with adore exploring much more about that topic. In case prospective, because arrive at practical knowledge, do you brain improving a person’s web site due to furthermore information and facts? This is of great help for everyone.

  16. Hi there! I could have sworn I’ve been to this site before but after looking at many of the articles I realized it’s new to me. Anyhow, I’m definitely happy I found it and I’ll be bookmarking it and checking back frequently!

  17. Please let me know if you’re looking for a writer for your site. You have some really great posts and I feel I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I’d love to write some material for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine. Please shoot me an email if interested. Regards!

  18. This design is incredible! You obviously know how to keep a reader amused. Between your wit and your videos, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Excellent job. I really enjoyed what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it. Too cool!

  19. The Nectarine has smooth-slick pores and skin like a Plum. The style is resembling a Peach. The significant distinction is that the Peach has a rough protective skin a prickly fiber that protects the fruit and if not wiped-off can hurt your tongue….

  20. I would like to add that when you do not already have got an insurance policy or else you do not belong to any group insurance, you could well reap the benefits of seeking the aid of a health insurance agent. Self-employed or people with medical conditions ordinarily seek the help of any health insurance agent. Thanks for your article.

  21. I really love your site.. Great colors & theme. Did you develop this website yourself? Please reply back as I’m planning to create my own personal website and want to find out where you got this from or exactly what the theme is called. Many thanks!

  22. Hi there! Would you make use of Facebook? My partner and i’d like to adhere to you in the event it would be alright. My partner and i’m totally enjoying your website and appear to brand new revisions.

  23. I simply desired to appreciate you once more. I do not know the things I would have accomplished in the absence of those smart ideas discussed by you relating to such industry. It was actually the daunting matter in my position, nevertheless noticing your professional strategy you resolved it forced me to cry with fulfillment. Extremely grateful for your information and in addition sincerely hope you really know what a great job you’re providing instructing men and women through your web site. I’m certain you’ve never encountered all of us.

  24. That being said by use it all, planet is really restored a little more. This situation in addition will this particular Skin tightening and starting to be moved and into the mood of these producing activities. daily deal livingsocial discount baltimore washington

  25. I blog often and I really thank you for your information. This article has truly peaked my interest. I am going to bookmark your website and keep checking for new information about once per week. I opted in for your Feed as well.

  26. An outstanding share! I’ve just forwarded this onto a colleague who had been conducting a little research on this. And he actually bought me breakfast due to the fact that I found it for him… lol. So let me reword this…. Thank YOU for the meal!! But yeah, thanx for spending time to talk about this matter here on your site.

  27. I appreciate bothering to debate now this, I believe truly about this plus enjoy knowing read more about this method subject matter. In case promising, as soon as you get to skill, is it possible you opinions adding all your web site by working with in depth content? This is used for me personally.

  28. I’ve been browsing on-line greater than three hours these days, but I by no means discovered any attention-grabbing article like yours. It is pretty value sufficient for me. Personally, if all webmasters and bloggers made good content as you probably did, the web shall be a lot more useful than ever before.

  29. Oh my goodness! Impressive article dude! Thank you so much, However I am having problems with your RSS. I don’t understand the reason why I am unable to join it. Is there anyone else having the same RSS issues? Anyone who knows the solution can you kindly respond? Thanx!!

  30. After going over a handful of the articles on your web site, I really like your technique of blogging. I saved it to my bookmark website list and will be checking back in the near future. Please visit my web site too and tell me what you think.

  31. Marriage ceremony Gown Suppliers – Right here you’ll find listing of high online gown suppliers with a special invitation out to readers to listing their wedding ceremony dress provider and if the expertise was an excellent or bad one.

  32. The very next time I read a blog, Hopefully it does not disappoint me as much as this one. After all, Yes, it was my choice to read, nonetheless I truly believed you’d have something useful to say. All I hear is a bunch of whining about something that you could possibly fix if you were not too busy seeking attention.

  33. You’re so interesting! I don’t think I have read through something like this before. So wonderful to discover another person with a few unique thoughts on this issue. Seriously.. thanks for starting this up. This website is one thing that’s needed on the internet, someone with a little originality.

  34. You’re so awesome! I do not suppose I have read through a single thing like this before. So nice to find someone with some genuine thoughts on this issue. Seriously.. thank you for starting this up. This website is something that is needed on the web, someone with some originality.

  35. I blog frequently and I genuinely thank you for your information. The article has really peaked my interest. I’m going to book mark your blog and keep checking for new information about once a week. I opted in for your Feed as well.

  36. You are so awesome! I don’t think I’ve read something like this before. So great to find another person with some unique thoughts on this topic. Seriously.. thank you for starting this up. This site is one thing that is needed on the web, someone with a little originality.

  37. After I initially commented I appear to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now each time a comment is added I get four emails with the exact same comment. There has to be a means you are able to remove me from that service? Kudos.

  38. Hi, I think your site could possibly be having browser compatibility problems. When I look at your blog in Safari, it looks fine however, if opening in I.E., it’s got some overlapping issues. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Other than that, excellent website!

  39. Hi, I do believe this is an excellent website. I stumbledupon it 😉 I will return yet again since I book marked it. Money and freedom is the best way to change, may you be rich and continue to help other people.

  40. Hello there! This post could not be written any better! Reading through this article reminds me of my previous roommate! He constantly kept talking about this. I will forward this information to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. I appreciate you for sharing!

  41. Hello! I could have sworn I’ve been to this site before but after going through some of the posts I realized it’s new to me. Regardless, I’m definitely happy I discovered it and I’ll be bookmarking it and checking back frequently!

  42. An impressive share! I have just forwarded this onto a colleague who has been doing a little research on this. And he in fact ordered me breakfast simply because I stumbled upon it for him… lol. So allow me to reword this…. Thank YOU for the meal!! But yeah, thanks for spending time to discuss this issue here on your blog.

  43. I’m very happy to discover this site. I want to to thank you for ones time for this particularly fantastic read!! I definitely liked every little bit of it and I have you saved as a favorite to look at new things on your blog.

  44. I’m impressed, I have to admit. Seldom do I come across a blog that’s equally educative and amusing, and without a doubt, you have hit the nail on the head. The issue is an issue that too few men and women are speaking intelligently about. Now i’m very happy that I came across this during my hunt for something relating to this.

  45. I have to thank you for the efforts you’ve put in writing this website. I really hope to view the same high-grade content by you later on as well. In fact, your creative writing abilities has encouraged me to get my own, personal site now 😉

  46. You’re so awesome! I don’t suppose I’ve read something like that before. So wonderful to find someone with unique thoughts on this subject matter. Seriously.. thanks for starting this up. This site is one thing that is needed on the internet, someone with a bit of originality.

  47. If you are living in a foreign location and are interested in sending money to your home country, you need to have a proper understanding of all the issues related to exchange rates fluctuation and how it is going to have an impact on the amount that you want to send home.

  48. Though the Dodge Dart was a fairly popular car produced from 1958 to 1976, the monstrous 426 Hemi-engine-powered 1968 model was made for one purpose and one purpose only – drag racing.

  49. I’d like to thank you for the efforts you’ve put in writing this website. I am hoping to view the same high-grade content from you in the future as well. In fact, your creative writing abilities has encouraged me to get my own website now 😉

  50. Your style is so unique compared to other folks I’ve read stuff from. Thank you for posting when you have the opportunity, Guess I’ll just bookmark this site.

  51. Can I simply just say what a comfort to discover somebody who genuinely understands what they’re discussing on the web. You definitely understand how to bring a problem to light and make it important. More and more people really need to check this out and understand this side of the story. It’s surprising you aren’t more popular because you most certainly have the gift.

  52. Howdy very nice web site!! Man .. Beautiful .. Superb .. I’ll bookmark your blog and take the feeds also…I’m glad to find a lot of helpful info here within the publish, we’d like work out extra techniques on this regard, thanks for sharing. . . . . .

  53. I would like to thank you for the efforts you’ve put in writing this site. I really hope to view the same high-grade blog posts from you later on as well. In fact, your creative writing abilities has inspired me to get my own site now 😉

  54. Right here is the right website for everyone who hopes to find out about this topic. You know so much its almost tough to argue with you (not that I personally will need to…HaHa). You certainly put a fresh spin on a subject that’s been written about for a long time. Wonderful stuff, just excellent.

  55. Your article value browsing. I came across the application well crafted along with simply logical. I must i think appreciate plenty of time you spent to create the following. I’m sure very pleased plus watch for your following blog post.

  56. Along with almost everything which seems to be developing inside this particular area, your viewpoints are actually somewhat radical. Having said that, I appologize, because I can not subscribe to your entire suggestion, all be it radical none the less. It appears to me that your commentary are not completely justified and in reality you are generally your self not even completely confident of your argument. In any event I did take pleasure in reading it.

  57. Issues may be contrasted with tactical puzzles typically found in chess columns or magazines during which the task is to seek out the most effective transfer or sequence of moves (normally resulting in mate or achieve of material) from a given place.

  58. I’m impressed, I must say. Rarely do I encounter a blog that’s both equally educative and engaging, and without a doubt, you have hit the nail on the head. The issue is something that not enough men and women are speaking intelligently about. I am very happy that I came across this during my hunt for something regarding this.

  59. I’m amazed, I must say. Rarely do I encounter a blog that’s equally educative and amusing, and without a doubt, you have hit the nail on the head. The problem is something that too few folks are speaking intelligently about. Now i’m very happy I found this in my hunt for something concerning this.

  60. I was very happy to discover this page. I need to to thank you for ones time due to this fantastic read!! I definitely liked every bit of it and I have you book marked to check out new information on your website.

  61. Oh my goodness! Incredible article dude! Thank you so much, However I am encountering difficulties with your RSS. I don’t know why I am unable to subscribe to it. Is there anyone else having the same RSS problems? Anybody who knows the answer will you kindly respond? Thanx!

  62. Hello there! This post couldn’t be written any better! Looking through this post reminds me of my previous roommate! He constantly kept talking about this. I am going to forward this article to him. Fairly certain he’s going to have a very good read. I appreciate you for sharing!

  63. Having read this I thought it was very enlightening. I appreciate you taking the time and energy to put this article together. I once again find myself personally spending way too much time both reading and commenting. But so what, it was still worthwhile!

  64. Having read this I thought it was really informative. I appreciate you finding the time and energy to put this informative article together. I once again find myself personally spending a lot of time both reading and leaving comments. But so what, it was still worth it!

  65. Can I simply just say what a comfort to find somebody who really knows what they’re talking about online. You certainly know how to bring a problem to light and make it important. More people have to read this and understand this side of your story. I was surprised you aren’t more popular because you definitely possess the gift.

  66. Fantastic beat ! I wish to apprentice while you amend your website, how could i subscribe for a blog site? The account aided me a acceptable deal. I had been a little bit acquainted of this your broadcast provided bright clear idea

  67. Good day! This is kind of off topic but I need some advice from an established blog. Is it hard to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal but I can figure things out pretty quick. I’m thinking about creating my own but I’m not sure where to begin. Do you have any points or suggestions? Thanks

  68. Howdy! This article could not be written much better! Reading through this article reminds me of my previous roommate! He constantly kept preaching about this. I will forward this post to him. Pretty sure he’ll have a very good read. Thanks for sharing!

  69. Widespread signs might embody feeling depressed a lot of the day, experiencing emotions of disgrace or guilt, having severe mood swings, dropping curiosity in activities that had been once pleasant, feeling tired on a regular basis, and having difficulty bonding with the baby.

  70. Oh my goodness! Amazing article dude! Many thanks, However I am experiencing problems with your RSS. I don’t understand the reason why I can’t subscribe to it. Is there anyone else having the same RSS issues? Anybody who knows the answer can you kindly respond? Thanks.

  71. The next time I read a blog, Hopefully it won’t disappoint me just as much as this one. I mean, Yes, it was my choice to read through, however I truly believed you would probably have something interesting to say. All I hear is a bunch of complaining about something you could possibly fix if you were not too busy looking for attention.

  72. Criteria consists of having a skilled welfare officer, DBS checks for all volunteers, emergency help-trained volunteers linked to every group, Respect programme sign-up, a Degree One coach for every youth team, appropriate membership administration in place and a volunteer co-ordinator.

  73. An impressive share! I have just forwarded this onto a co-worker who was conducting a little research on this. And he in fact ordered me breakfast simply because I found it for him… lol. So allow me to reword this…. Thank YOU for the meal!! But yeah, thanks for spending time to talk about this issue here on your web site.

  74. Within the Laramide orogeny, which started about 65-seventy five million years ago, the Western United States underwent stress in rock formation; within the 4 Corners region this pushed up the preexisting layers and finally formed the Colorado Plateau (and the Rocky Mountains).

  75. 5, stunning his opponent and the commentators by choosing the French Defence, an opening final seen in a world championship match in 1978 (performed there twice by Viktor Korchnoi; each video games ended in a draw).

  76. This consists of things like updating the HVAC and plumbing systems, switching to a inexperienced vitality source like solar energy, changing older windows with extra vitality-environment friendly ones, or even something as simple as fixing or plugging up any leaks.

  77. I need to warning you not to utilize free binary option alerts for buying and selling ( that’s, in the event that they exist) since these signals are virtually carelessly made and this could danger your prosperity in your binary choices buying and selling.