Seksualinės problemos yra išsprendžiamos (be terapijos)

Seksualinės problemos yra išsprendžiamos (be terapijos)

Labai retai atsitinka, kad žmogus niekada nesusidurtų su seksualine problema savo gyvenime. Tačiau dėl plačiai paplitusios kultūrinės tylos, susijusios su sąžiningu seksualumo aptarimu, daugybė žmonių, turinčių seksualinių problemų, kenčia tyliai ir gėdingai. Deja, tokios problemos, kurios galėtų būti išspręstos, vietoj to vystosi ir tampa sunkiau išsprendžiamos. Tai nelaiminga nuosmukio spiralė. Tačiau tai nėra neišvengiama baigtis. Iš tikrųjų, dauguma seksualinių problemų yra išsprendžiamos be medicininės ar psichologinės intervencijos.

Gerai žinomas modelis, Jacko Annon’o (1976) PLISSIT modelis, rodo, kad 80-90% seksualinių problemų gali būti išspręstos be profesionalios pagalbos, įskaitant psichoterapiją. Kitaip tariant, šis modelis teigia, kad mums nereikia „intensyvios terapijos“ (IT PLISSIT) norint išspręsti seksualines problemas.

Štai keletas pavyzdžių tokių intervencijų:

Viena studentė man atskleidė, kad ji manė, jog su ja yra kažkas labai blogai, nes jai patiko grubus seksas, nors ji save laikė feministe. Aš jai pasakiau, kad tai yra visiškai priimtina seksualinė aistra (t.y., „leidimas“). Papildomai pateikiau „informaciją“ apie tyrimus, rodančius, kad žmonės, kurie mėgsta „kinkinius“ sekso tipus, yra tokie pat sveiki (o kai kuriais atžvilgiais, pvz., atvirumu naujoms patirtims ir seksualinei komunikacijai, net sveikesni) nei tie, kurie praktikuoja „vanilinį“ seksą.

Prieš kelias dienas jaunas vyras paskambino ir paklausė, ar gali ateiti pas mane į terapiją dėl priešlaikinės ejakuliacijos. Aš jo paklausiau, kokiomis seksualinėmis aplinkybėmis (pvz., masturbacija, lytinis aktas) ir kiek laiko užtrunka, kol jis ejakuliuoja. Jis pasakė, kad jis patiria orgazmą šiek tiek mažiau nei per penkias minutes po varpos įvedimo į partnerės makštį. Aš jam pasakiau, kad tai yra normos ribose, pateikdamas tyrimo, kuriame dalyvavo apie 500 porų iš penkių šalių, rezultatus: vidutinis laikas nuo varpos įvedimo į makštį iki ejakuliacijos yra 5,4 minutės. Trumpai tariant, pateikiau jam „informaciją“, kuri sumažino jo nerimą.

Dirbdamas su moterimis, kurios niekada nepatyrė orgazmo, pateikiu „informaciją“ apie genitalijų anatomiją ir faktą, kad tik 4-15% moterų gali patirti orgazmą vien nuo lytinio akto, o likusioms reikia klitorio stimuliacijos. Tolesni „pasiūlymai“ apima masturbaciją, įskaitant vibratorių naudojimą, nes tyrimai rodo, kad moterys, kurios naudoja vibratorius, patiria lengvesnius ir dažnesnius orgazmus nei tos, kurios jų nenaudoja. Taip pat „pasiūlau“ išmokti dėmesingumo technikų, kad išjungtų dažnai nerimą keliantį protą sekso metu, taip pat gauti tą pačią stimuliaciją su partneriu, kaip ir būnant vienai.

261 thoughts on “Seksualinės problemos yra išsprendžiamos (be terapijos)
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